3 things I did, that I now know better than to do again.

So Tuesday was my big Halloween get down at the library, the one that I so sensitively advertised as a “Masquerade Party” so that even families that shun the more obvious pagan rituals could come too. I decided to dress up like Pippi Longstocking, who I am constantly being compared to anyways. I mean, all I had to do was put some pipe cleaners in my braids, and POW! instant spunky storybook heroine. I wore this super fantastic 70’s flowy pantsuit jumper thing, with a really cool red & white stripey shirt underneath. You can’t see the patch, but it’s all molars and rainbows in perfect harmony. The stripey shirt was acquired from the merch table of this band Neon Hunk, who look like their stylist could be some hypercolored freak on walrus Ritalin. I’m not sure if they still “exist” or even really where they were from, but I saw them play a few times, and mostly remember that they were super cute. Except that you couldn’t tell that they were on the pretty side because they wore these full out costumes. For some reason, I really like when attractive people wear masks.

In the past year, I found that I can’t stand leaving a place with ringing ears, so I doubt I would ever go “hear” them play ever again, but I would definitely recommend “seeing” them. Here’s a video of them, maybe you’re like me and would rather watch it with the sound down all the way.

But anyways, back to the three really silly things I did, all in the span of of a few short hours. The first silly thing I did happened when I was setting up the room for the “Masquerade Party”. I thought man, the library always smells like pee… I’m gonna bring in some sage to make it smell a little spooky and cover up the old wayfarin’ stranger stench. I have several bushes of it growing at my house, and recently started drying it to make my own smudge sticks. Well, I really only started burning it after I had a friend stay over for a few weeks who kept having these really freaky night terrors. I was somewhat convinced that she was possessed so I thought I would smudge the place, you know, just in case. Oh yeah, so I burned a little sage and went about my business of sticky tacking bats to the wall, when I noticed a man coughing outside. And then I noticed that the air was really thick. And then a teenager knocked on the door and wanted to know if I was getting high in there. And then I realized, crap, crap, crap… I HAVE MADE THE LIBRARY SMELL LIKE WEED… Crap, crap, crap. I went to get a second opinion. It was confirmed, THE LIBRARY SMELLS LIKE WEED and it’s all my fault!!! Anyways, after a little sweatin’ and hoping that I wouldn’t get fired or make all the parents think I was a mega dope smoker,  I ended up finding some cover scent with a little help from my friends. I sprayed a bunch of Bath & Bodyworks stuff plus some Lysol all over the room. Then, I put the fan on, and when the first kid arrived shortly after that, he went in and came back out saying, “It smells really good in there, I’m gonna go back in and smell it again”… aaahhh saved by the smell.

The second really dumb thing I did involved green food coloring and looked like this. I am not allowed to use food coloring ever again. Let’s just say my fingernails are still green, and I’m glad Snow White’s mother was really laid back about having her daughter’s pretty cap sleeved costume looking a little more like Shrek than when she started.

The third and thankfully, last senseless thing I did on Tuesday was to drop a very full glass jar containing popcorn kernals all over the kitchen floor. Bunny and Samsara were not pleased. I was the end of a very long and consuming day and I the last thing I wanted to be doing was sweeping up the kitchen floor. I was really looking forward to chugging a Wittekerke along with my popcorn & soy parmesan, and forgetting how hard it is to make eye contact with over 60 people. The party was really crowded, and it’s really hard to take in the energy of that many children and parents all by yourself. I definitely prefer a more intimate gathering.

On the upside, there were loads of cute costumes and I have to point out a few of my favorites. First there was Yoda, who is like just 2 an’ a half years old. He comes every week to Family Storytime and is such a cutie anyways, but dressed as Yoda he almost made me lose an ovary.

This other little darlin’ is my pal Soraya. She is the most talkin’est young child I know. Her wise mama, a practicing midwife, started Soraya on sign language early on. Now, that girl could speak circles around kids twice her age.

Anyhow, Miss Soraya came to the party, accompanied by her new baby brother, as a “punk rock pumpkin” she had spiky gelled hair, a bright orange tutu and the tiniest chuck taylors I’d ever seen.

Notwithstanding my crackhead mistakes of the day, the party went off fairly well. After such a long week, (I made 5 library lady appearances), I’m actually very very excited about the one I’m making tomorrow. As odd as it is, after spending the first 24 years of my life an only child, I now have a little brother. His name is Jesse and he just started Kindergarten this year! He and my mom, live a little over an hour away, and I am going to visit his school and tell stories in the morning. I can’t wait!

Happy Hallowen everyone!